Growing Up
Its strange really, back in February I wrote a post about how I'm back after a long time and then gave a quick update on the last three years of my life. One of things in particular was:
"...I've fully delved back into the world of tabletop role-playing games so going forward (if i choose to actually keep this updated) that will be a huge topic I will be discussing. I've been effectively running a wonderful Dnd 5e game for about a year and a half now as well as running another DnD 5e game, running a Star Wars FFG game, AND being a player in a DnD 5e. Suffice to say I'm all in and I thought it would be a harrowing experience but I've actually been balancing pretty well, though I do admit I tend to be consistently tired."
Well, here I am 4 months later and everything seems to have dropped. I'm still a player in a DnD 5e game though its a new campaign now and my second character in second campaign, the Star Wars FFG game has been on hiatus since about April and my wonderful 5e game that has been going on for about a year and a half lost almost all of its players at once so I'm working hard to end this campaign soon and start something new with a smaller group.
This leads me to the topic I want to discuss today and that's growing up. I recently came to a crazy realization. For a good amount of my DM life I have always wanted to have players that are in and around my age group (mid 20s - early 30s) because its good psychology and we get the same jokes and stuff and I would think it would lead to more regularity (i.e. never missing sessions etc etc) boy was I wrong.
If you talk to any of my players they will tell you that as a DM I do expect my game to be pretty high priority in peoples lives, obviously not more important than family or school or anything but when it comes to going to a friends bonfire or a DnD game I expect them to choose the DnD game; obviously I tell them all of this before they officially join the group and the campaign, and for a year and half that went well. However, with summer on the horizon and conventions and stuff and people leaving the group cuz of it. This led to me making a huge realization. My age group is not good for the level of RP gaming I want to DM for. Let me tell you about another game I ran recently that had a whole other level of awesome to it:
This past Friday I ran a intro session for FFG's Genesys system. Two things stood out to me for this game: 1. it was big, like 8 people and 2. Besides my girlfriend all the other players were 45-50+ years old. What occurred this evening was just three hours of fun and excitement of being steampunk mermaid pirates and just the look of elated joy in these players eyes as if they were 20 again. The feeling was amazing. After the game they mentioned me joining their star wars game and how dedicated they were in their story which had been going on fo ryears with no one ever missing a session, like ever. I was just dumbfounded at this and its here I made the huge realization as stated before.
People my age are young, they have lots of friends and plans and want to do lots of things. Go to a concert, hiking, beach days drinking etc etc. Sure that type of stuff s usually stereotyped to early 20s more than my age group but there is still that sense of adventure and excitement and wanting to do things and just do it. Sure most of the time people my age are broke but that still doesn't stop them from going on a hike or just going to a friends house and play video games.
The fact of the matter is I don't want that. I don't wanna do anything like that most of the time. I want to play DnD and Star Wars RPG and every other tabletop game all day and everyday. That is a mentality I don't see in my age group. Then we get to these people who are 45-50+ in age and I realize they did all that stuff already, drinking, beach days, conventions, concerts, etc. They are older now all they want to do is play tabletop RPGs cuz it gives them that sense of being young and doing crazy things. They are dedicated and place their Tabletop RPG as their high priority, again, obviously not more important than family or school, but between a bonfire and going to DnD they will choose DnD and that is the kind of group that fuels my creative engines and pushes my DM muscles. That is who I want to DM for.
I will conclude with this, Its okay if you don't have DnD as a priority and if you choose a bonfire over a DnD game that is fine I will probably be upset for a bit but then I will understand. Fact of the matter is this isn't about people my age not being dedicated or anything cuz its not, my age group has a lot to deal with everyday through the eyes of news and Facebook posts, its about me and the type of group I want to be a DM for. A group that puts the game as their priority behind family and school and who gets immense joy every session and playing their tabletop RPGs 3-4x a week like I do.
Simply put I've realized that I want to DM for those that have already grown up and while it may not be much of a revelation to people, or they might have already known everything I wrote about above, to me that was a a huge moment of recognition and that just gives me a sense of clarity that I haven't had in a long while.
Growing up, man what a ride.
"...I've fully delved back into the world of tabletop role-playing games so going forward (if i choose to actually keep this updated) that will be a huge topic I will be discussing. I've been effectively running a wonderful Dnd 5e game for about a year and a half now as well as running another DnD 5e game, running a Star Wars FFG game, AND being a player in a DnD 5e. Suffice to say I'm all in and I thought it would be a harrowing experience but I've actually been balancing pretty well, though I do admit I tend to be consistently tired."
Well, here I am 4 months later and everything seems to have dropped. I'm still a player in a DnD 5e game though its a new campaign now and my second character in second campaign, the Star Wars FFG game has been on hiatus since about April and my wonderful 5e game that has been going on for about a year and a half lost almost all of its players at once so I'm working hard to end this campaign soon and start something new with a smaller group.
This leads me to the topic I want to discuss today and that's growing up. I recently came to a crazy realization. For a good amount of my DM life I have always wanted to have players that are in and around my age group (mid 20s - early 30s) because its good psychology and we get the same jokes and stuff and I would think it would lead to more regularity (i.e. never missing sessions etc etc) boy was I wrong.
If you talk to any of my players they will tell you that as a DM I do expect my game to be pretty high priority in peoples lives, obviously not more important than family or school or anything but when it comes to going to a friends bonfire or a DnD game I expect them to choose the DnD game; obviously I tell them all of this before they officially join the group and the campaign, and for a year and half that went well. However, with summer on the horizon and conventions and stuff and people leaving the group cuz of it. This led to me making a huge realization. My age group is not good for the level of RP gaming I want to DM for. Let me tell you about another game I ran recently that had a whole other level of awesome to it:
This past Friday I ran a intro session for FFG's Genesys system. Two things stood out to me for this game: 1. it was big, like 8 people and 2. Besides my girlfriend all the other players were 45-50+ years old. What occurred this evening was just three hours of fun and excitement of being steampunk mermaid pirates and just the look of elated joy in these players eyes as if they were 20 again. The feeling was amazing. After the game they mentioned me joining their star wars game and how dedicated they were in their story which had been going on fo ryears with no one ever missing a session, like ever. I was just dumbfounded at this and its here I made the huge realization as stated before.
People my age are young, they have lots of friends and plans and want to do lots of things. Go to a concert, hiking, beach days drinking etc etc. Sure that type of stuff s usually stereotyped to early 20s more than my age group but there is still that sense of adventure and excitement and wanting to do things and just do it. Sure most of the time people my age are broke but that still doesn't stop them from going on a hike or just going to a friends house and play video games.
The fact of the matter is I don't want that. I don't wanna do anything like that most of the time. I want to play DnD and Star Wars RPG and every other tabletop game all day and everyday. That is a mentality I don't see in my age group. Then we get to these people who are 45-50+ in age and I realize they did all that stuff already, drinking, beach days, conventions, concerts, etc. They are older now all they want to do is play tabletop RPGs cuz it gives them that sense of being young and doing crazy things. They are dedicated and place their Tabletop RPG as their high priority, again, obviously not more important than family or school, but between a bonfire and going to DnD they will choose DnD and that is the kind of group that fuels my creative engines and pushes my DM muscles. That is who I want to DM for.
I will conclude with this, Its okay if you don't have DnD as a priority and if you choose a bonfire over a DnD game that is fine I will probably be upset for a bit but then I will understand. Fact of the matter is this isn't about people my age not being dedicated or anything cuz its not, my age group has a lot to deal with everyday through the eyes of news and Facebook posts, its about me and the type of group I want to be a DM for. A group that puts the game as their priority behind family and school and who gets immense joy every session and playing their tabletop RPGs 3-4x a week like I do.
Simply put I've realized that I want to DM for those that have already grown up and while it may not be much of a revelation to people, or they might have already known everything I wrote about above, to me that was a a huge moment of recognition and that just gives me a sense of clarity that I haven't had in a long while.
Growing up, man what a ride.
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